Who's pouring the beer?

I was going through my Little Pink Notebook tonight, and I noticed something very bothersome. Many of the beers I tried had little to no information. Now hear me out before you judge. But I want to know who decided it was a good idea to hire models to pour beer at a Beerfest? Don't get me wrong, I don't mind if the model actually works for the brewery or actually knows something about the beer they are pouring. But I'm not there for a live Budweiser commercial.

This weekend at The Big Pour, I was constantly given blank stares when I asked about the brewery which they were pouring for. Most of them didn't know anything about the beer period! It was so annoying and aggravating.

There were so many breweries that I was excite to try. I really wanted to talk to someone who could tell me about the beer they were serving. I was excited to try all the new beers. I wanted to know about the different styles they brewed and what was available in my area. I wanted to ask them about the hops and the malts. I wanted to know how they brewed and aged their beers. But I couldn't.

Instead, I was told "I don't know" or "I don't work for the company". It sucked. So I usually took my sample, made a few notes, and moved on to the next table looking for a little beer conversation. Luckily, I was able to find it.

So a word to you, the distributors and breweries. Do yourself a favor. Use educated people to pour your beer. Most people who are willing to fork over $30 or more to try some quality beer aren't there for a Miller Light. They like beer, and they want to know about it. If they wanted some pretty girl to give them beer, they would head down to the local bar and have the girls sell them buckets of cheap, mass produced beer with hopes of winning a free koosie.

-Cheers

This Bud's for You

Note: It didn't work on Zerksis, and it didn't work on us.

Did you have absolutely nothing to do last Saturday night? If you one of the few, and didn't have anything to watch on your Tivo, then you might have done something stupid, like call your old girlfriend, or "drunk channel" surfed and crashed into the latest installment of Saturday Night Live.

The once famous show who gave us stars like Eddie Murphy, Bill Murray, Will Ferrell and Tim Meadows is a mere shell of it's once great self. To add insult to injury, along comes Anheuser Busch to drag the once funny show, further down their spilled beer drain.

I don't know who though it would be a good idea, but the CSI of beer (aka Bud Light Golden Wheat) was the sole sponsor for the entire show. Nearly ever commercial was a Bud Light Golden Wheat commercial. Every segment was brought to you by Bud Light Golden Wheat. There were even Bud Light Golden Wheat viewing parties around the country where I'm sure they handed out Bud Light Golden Wheat t-shirts and Bud Light Golden Wheat koosies.

As hard as I tried to watch the guy from 300 attempt to be funny, I just couldn't get over the constant bombardment of Bud Light Golden Wheat adds. It was nothing short of annoying. What disgust I already have for Anheuser Busch (which brings you Bud Light Golden Wheat) was magnified by the power of 10 burning suns!

Was it really necessary? Was it even a good idea? I don't think so. In fact, I think it probably had the complete opposite effect that AB (who brings you Bud Light Golden Wheat) was looking for. It became almost comical. In fact, the repeated commercials became the best humor of the night. Not for the comedic value, but for the joke that it was.

If not for that kid in the flying saucer balloon (which I think was sponsored by Bud Light Golden Wheat), this would be the worst publicity stunt of the year!

-Cheers

-This blog post was not brought to you by, Bud Light Golden Wheat.

My problem with BevMo

Since "the incident" this summer, things have been great at BevMo. Everyone knows my name, I get treated with the utmost courtesy, and I leave happy every time. After my dealings with Alan Johnson, I found a new respect for his company. However, that respect has been wavering lately.

When it comes to beer drinking season, what comes to mind? Cinco De Mayo? St. Patrick's Day? Sure, but nothing says beer like Oktoberfest! So you would think that BevMo would be busting at the seems with seasonal beers from all the breweries to celebrate. However, that isn't the case.

Starting in September, I have been stopping by the local BevMo to see what kind of Oktoberfest Marzen style beers they had available. I look forward to this every year. But all I have been able to find in Samuel Adams Oktoberfest. Yes, they do carry Paulaner Oktoberfest all year around, and it keeps me satisfied throughout the rest of the year.

But what about the rest of the breweries? What about Flying Dog Dogtoberfest, Erdinger Oktoberfest Weizen, Leinenkugel's Oktoberfest, or Left Hand Brewing Company's Oktoberfest? I was able to buy them last week. But no at BevMo. No, I bought them at Total Wine and More. None of these seasonal Oktoberfest beers were available at BevMo.

As I mentioned, the one Oktoberfest beer I am able to get in a keg from BevMo is the Samuel Adams Oktoberfest. Because I am a loyal customer, and I like the way they have treated me, I ordered one. That was over 3 weeks ago.

Take a wild guess who took my order? Yes, the same fella I had the run in with this summer. Before I go on, let me tell you that he did apologize to me a while back. It was sincere, and I accepted. So I figured when I went in to order my keg, he would make sure to take care of if for me. Well, that didn't happen. I have been waiting for the phone call. It never came. I figured they were just waiting on me to stop by since.

I have been wondering about my keg, so I stopped by tonight. None of the regular guys were working tonight. So I asked the guy atop the ordering desk if my keg was ready. I told him that I had orderd a keg about 3 weeks ago, and it should be there for me. But guess what, it wasn't. I was shocked. How could this have happened? Things had been great since the "incident". So how could they let me down like this?

I went ahead and ordered the keg, again. It should be there Thursday. If not, I think that will be the perfect time to head over to Total Wine, and buy 2 kegs, and a bunch of Oktoberfest!

-Cheers

Not enough beer in the world

I have been slacking. I haven't been here in nearly 2 weeks now. It is so unlike me. What has happened? Someone has entered my life and disrupted it. They have thrown my entire world off it's nicely spinning axis. And I don't know what to do to get it spinning again.

About 4 weeks ago, I was introduced to a guy who needed my services. A mutual friend hooked us up. And since I am a guy who loves to make money, I agreed to make the money without realizing the amount of time and wasted effort if would take to make this person happy.

I know I am good. And I figured that I would be able to spend the allotted amount of time with this guy, and make a big chuck of change. However, it seems Satan has sent his spawn and I am now stuck in a never ending vortex. And as of a few minutes ago, I it started all over again.

There isn't enough beer in the world to help me stay sane. I don't know what to do. I don't know when it will ever end. And I don't know what to do. I guess I am going to keep drinking as much beer as possible with hopes that the Happy Juice will take me away.

In the mean time, I have been going through the brews. Check out the "what I'm drinking section". I'm sure it is going to double in length this week.

-help!

I love Draft Magazine, but they suck!

I love Draft Magazine. It is so cool to have a magazine that caters to Beer. Sure, there have been and still are other magazines that cater to beer. However Draft Magazine seems to be a modern view on today's beer culture. But why is it so hard to get?

The first time I found a copy of it on the shelf, I bought it. Didn't even thumb through it. I just knew I had to have it, and that I was going to love it. And I was right! I read it cover to cover in one night. Then I went back and looked through it countless times.

Then came the hard part, waiting for the next issue. So I signed up for a subscription, and waited. Then I waited some more. Then I waited even more. Then I found the next issue on the shelf at the bookstore. So I bought it. But I wondered why I never received it at home. Maybe the subscription just missed the shipping date. So I was sure I would get the next issue. Nope. It never came.

I signed up and paid for my original subscription in October of 2008. Come March of 2009, still no issues in the mail. I was starting to get a little irritated. So I sent off a bunch of emails trying to find out what the deal was. After a few days, I received an email back letting me know that they had no record of my subscription. That is funny. Because I forwarded them the email with my receipt, and my confirmation number. I forwarded it to them again, and told them that they took the money out of my account. So either way, they owed me money, or a subscription.

A few days after my last email, I received an email informing me that they had found my account. They were sorry, blah, blah, blah. Problem with the distributor, etc. The email said I would start receiving my issues "shortly". And guess what, I received an issue. The January/February issue. I guess all was well.

That issue has been the only issue I have received. I still have yet to get another issue in the mail. What the hell is wrong with them? I wanted to call, or send another email, but I didn't seem to solve the problem the first time. This time, I wanted to talk to them face to face. And that is exactly what I did.

A few weeks ago, Draft Magazine held the Craft Beer Festival. I was there to help pour, and try some amazing beers. However, I was looking to talk to someone about my subscription. When I arrived, I signed in and got mt credentials. Then I asked who I could talk to about my subscription problem. The woman sitting at the registration table said she could help me. She informed me that she was aware of some "issues" with the delivery of the magazines. She said she would help me, and asked that I stop by again at the end of the show so I could give her all my information.

Once the show was over, I made sure that I talked to her again about my subscription. I stopped by her table on my way out, and asked what she could do. She took all my information. My name, address, email, and phone number. She said she was going to get all the outstanding issues and send them to me. I "will get one big bundle of magazines in the mail". She apologized and told me that they were in the process of switching distributors. But she was going to take care of it. She said she was going to send me an email soon letting me know that she took care of it.

That was 2 weeks ago. No email. No magazines. And another issue on the shelf. But no issues in my mail. I just don't get it. What the hell is wrong with them? I love the magazine. I have been to both of their Beerfests. I am trying to support them. But they are not helping.

This isn't over. I am going to get my money back and sign up for a different magazine. So consider this a warning. If you are thinking about signing up for a subscription to Draft Magazine, think long and hard. There are other magazines out there like All About Beer, BEER, Brew Your Own, Celebrator, and Mutineer. I haven't had any problems with them.

-Cheers!

BevMo Sucks (well, the employee does)

Can you believe I said that? I can't. I really don't think BevMo sucks. I love the BevMo. But today, I had my first negative experience there. I will tell you what, I was pissed!

I have been wanting to replace my kegs for the last week now. I have stopped by the BevMo two or three times, but the guy I normally deal with hasn't been there. And I really didn't want to order it from the older lady who runs the checkout. She just doesn't seem to understand what I am trying to order.

Total Wine offers Dogfish Head 60 Minute IPa in 5 gallon kegs for $64.00. So I can get it there if I have to. But I like the BevMo, and it is closer to my house, and I really like the guy I deal with. So I prefer to buy it from him.

Time is running out, so I stopped by tonight to see if anyone could help me. Again, the cool guy was out, and the old lady was running the register. Just as usual, she didn't know what I was talking about. She also thought that I called earlier about it, which I didn't. I tried to explain to her that it wasn't me, and that I was looking for a Dogfish Head. Finally, she asked the older fella, who I guess was the acting manager. "This is the guy who called earlier asking about the Dogs Head". No, that wasn't me.

I told him that I wanted to order a keg that wasn't on their list. He started to walk over to grab the flier with all the kegs listed. I again told him that it wasn't listed in the flier, but Total Wine offers it, and I wanted to see if BevMo can get it as well. He said he would check right now.

So I followed him over to the station with the computer. He found Dogfish Head 60 minute IPA right away. I thought to myself, Excellent. Then I asked him if there were any other Dogfish Head beers available in addition to the 60 Minute IPA. So he looked again, "yes, there are 3". Really, 3? How cool is that! I need 3 kegs. 90 Minute IPA and Raison D'etre are the other two. So I asked how much the 90 minute was. He looked down at the computer again, typed a little bit, and said it was $159. Wow, that is a little more than the $64 at Total Wine.

I asked him if that was for a 5 gallon keg. He looked down again, and then said "no, it isn't available in 5 gallon kegs". Hmmm, really? It is at Total Wine. So I began to tell him that Total Wine advertises it for $64. But before I could get out that information, he leaned over the wall, put his hand in my face as if he was telling me to stop, and loudly commanded me to "Sir, Calm Down!"

What just happened? Is this guys seriously scolding me? Yes, he was. That is exactly what happened. He just yelled at me. What the hell? I told him to "forget it". Turned and started to walk away. He stood up and replied "sir, I am sorry. I was being rude". Damn right asshole, you were being rude. I didn't say that, but I wanted too. Instead, I told him that I was trying to help him. Then I said that I spend a lot of money in that store, and never have I been talked to that way. I turned and walked out, all the time with him calling "Sir......Sir.........Sir............"

I wasn't about to give this guy my business. What was he thinking? I was shocked he scolded me like that. Actually, I was pissed. Normally, I would have enjoyed giving the douche bag a piece of my mind, but today was not the day for it. Lucky for him.

So guess what I am doing tomorrow. I am going to drive my happy ass over to Total Wine and order 3 kegs. I should have done that in the first place. They have a better beer selection, better prices, and now, better employees. In fact, one of them posted a reply on my blog a while back. Nobody from BevMo ever did that.

-Cheers!

Double D's. The good and the bad.

You gotta love Double D's. I know I do. I'm a big fan of them. In fact, they are my favorite. But this weekend, I was the DD, a.k.a The Designated Driver. I did the job with pride and dignity. But I will tell you this, it was the first and the last time.

Since I am who I am, friends expect me to be in the mood to drink, constantly. Sometimes when I really didn't want to. But this weekend, they wanted me drink up, and I was more than willing to participate. But I couldn't. By my own mistake, and lack of planning, I ended up driving 4 of us home.

It was a fun night. Out at a theme bar with a huge group of friends for a friends 40th. I love to get people drunk. There aren't many things funnier than dunk people (as long as they are happy drunks). I will buy you shots until you puke, or pass out. I make a great wing man. I helped all the husbands get "some" if you know what I mean. So overall, it was a good time.

On a night like this, a DD is a must. But it just isn't my thing, unless it is my car, which I love! Nobody gets to drive my car. The theme of the bar wasn't something that I would have ever chosen. After a few beers I might have found it tolerable. After 6 or 7, I might have even enjoyed myself. But after 3 plus hours or horrible songs screeched out by tone deaf high school band geeks who never "made it" and a group of inebriated women screaming in my ears, I wanted to vomit. In fact, I feel like I have a headache and I didn't drink.

Don't get me wrong. The DD is a vital part of a night out with alcohol. No matter what, driving even a little buzzed is something I will never do.

So to all my friends (who will never read this), I say "you suck" and "your welcome".

- Cheers.

Party Foul

I went over to a friends house tonight to play poker. I am not much of a poker player, but I have fun anyway. Besides, it was a shitty day so I was looking to blow off a little steam. It was a perfect reason to drink some good beer.

As with most poker nights, it was BYOB. I prefer it that way because there is nothing worse than showing up and having nothing but Bud Light to drink. So I made a stop at the BevMo on my way over to get a few treats.

I picked up the usual favorites. Fuller's, Paulaner, Ayinger, and Tennent's. I also picked up a couple new ones just for fun. A Left Coast Sawtooth Ale and the new seasonal K-9 Cruiser Winter Ale from Flying Dog.

The night started off perfect with the pint of Ayinger. I then moved on to the Fuller's London Pride as I moved on the the next round. This was the highpoint of the night because my money soon ran out just as my Tennent's ran out. I needed something to make me feel a little better.

How about a little Holiday cheer in a bottle. Time to bust out the K-9 Cruiser Winter Ale.

I made my way to the kitchen to grab my bottle from the fridge. But something wasn't right. I swear I had only finished 3 of my beers. That should leave 3 more in the fridge. But I can only count 2. What happened?

I see the bottle of Left Hand, and the bottle of Paulaner. But the bottle of Flying Dog is missing. I didn't drink it. Did I misplace it? Did it get moved? What the hell happened?

Someone took it! I closed the fridge and scanned the kitchen. There it was. Sitting on the counter by the sink, empty! What the Fuck?

What kind of loser drinks another man's beer? And not just any beer, but a quality beer that everyone was asking about when I got there. Bringing a 6 pack of 6 different beers that they had never head of was like showing up in a Ferrari. But you don't steal the Ferrari when the owner isn't looking. You might ask for a ride (or a taste), but you don't take it.

I love to share beer with people. I will give you a beer just to hear your opinion of it. I will give you a beer with hopes that it might sway you to give up Coors. I will even buy you a beer to get you drunk. All you have to do is ask. But it pisses me off when they steal it. That just isn't right. That is a major Party Foul!

That sucks. I am out $20, and a beer.

Whorelloween, not just for adults anymore.

I don't know what to say. I wrote my last post about the women (WOMEN) who want to dress like Hookers in hopes of getting lucky, or making up for lost time in high school. But I was shocked by the number of adolescent school girls who came trick or treating to my house dressed in the very costumes I wrote about yesterday. What the hell?

What parent would allow their teenage daughter dress up like a prostitute for some candy? An actual prostitute might. But I doubt there are any in my neighborhood. What is wrong with parents today?

I think I know the answer to this question (they don't give a shit). Still, it amazes me that parents would allow their kids to dress like they work for Heidi Fleiss. Then they are all shocked and appalled when their 16 year old daughter comes home pregnant. The fact that the daddy has a semester of community college and a job as the night manager of the Burger King doesn't make it right.

I'm not trying to drag down family values of today, but come on. Have you ever watched Chris Hansen of Dateline? Parents, get your kids in line. Get a little involved. Don't let your daughters grow up to be a Prostitot.

How much for a word?

A man is only as good as his word. That is what my dad always told me. He told me that people who lie, or make deals without following through with them are people you want to avoid. Without his word, what is that man worth? I will tell you, nothing. So I say to that person, you suck!

You are a dirt bag. How can you tell a person that you are going to do something, and then at the blink of an eye, not do it? Or better yet, not even bother to tell them that were no longer going to doing it? Instead, you run away and hide, then leave it up to someone else to do your dirty work. Are you kidding me? This is 2008. 9 year old kids have cell phones, text messaging, and email. You, a grown adult can't seem get hold of one of these simple forms of technology, to simply let everyone know that you suck. You really did it. You backed out of your deal faster than a truckload of illegals in the Home Depot parking lot when "the man" shows up.

So to everyone out there who ever screwed someone by giving their word, and backing out of it, I have 4 words for you. "Karma is a bitch"! I pray to God that someone, sometime, returns the favor. Then you will see what it is like to betrayed by someone. You will feel the pain and panic set in as you think to yourself, "what the hell am I going to do now". You are a gutless piece of shit. Your word is worth nothing. Therefore, you are worth nothing. Do everyone a favor and just crawl back into your hole and die.